Tipping the Scales

*As I've said repeatedly and will continue to say, you have to find what works for you, and what you read in my blog is purely what works for me.* 

A lot of advice out there when it comes to scales is "Don't weigh yourself every day", "Put the scale up", "Throw out the full length mirror", etc. And this works for some people, no doubt about it. Not for this girl though. Do you know one thing I did both the last time I got this heavy and this time (besides eat a bunch of junk and sit on my ass)? I stopped stepping on the scale. If I'm not seeing those numbers go up I can ignore them, and ignoring the problem was easier than facing the issue.

What helped me last time, and what I'm continuing to do today, is stepping on that scale every single day. I definitely can understand how that can be dangerous for some people, if you can't fully acknowledge the fact that weight fluctuates and not freak out and the non-loss or small gains, then this isn't a recommendation for you. But for me, it helps me to see how my body weight fluctuates day to day, even multiple times a day. I know that there can be a 5lb difference in my body between morning and night, and that doesn't mean that I've actually gained 5lbs. I can see that if I went over my sodium intake, that it's probably causing a bunch of water retention in that 2lb gain the next day. And I can see that my period continues to be an evil bitch by adding up to 7 freaking lbs onto my body that week. But those numbers always go back down. For me, being able to see how I eat and my activity affect the number helps me to better understand my body and what works and doesn't work for it.

The number on the scale is definitely not a deciding factor on success, though. Numbers just work at helping motivate me, even when they don't move. Measurements are definitely the key and most important measurement on this journey. I only measure myself in one month intervals though, because those numbers are smaller and are going to be smaller drops (but bigger rewards) than the scale's much larger numbers.

Today, I'm down 3.2lbs since last week! Now, had I done a weekly weigh in like most people that would have been on Sunday which showed like a .8lb loss at the time. Since I step on it every morning, I'm able to catch the losses when they happen and it definitely feels rewarding. Some people will look at 3.2 and not see a great success, but it's awesome. Stop watching Biggest Loser and comparing yourselves to others losses. It is possible to get the big numbers in the beginning, especially the heavier you are, but most of that is just going to be your initial water weight drop and it's going to balance out to normal numbers. 1-2lb losses per week is your goal. And even if you lose just .5lbs, that's freaking fantastic that's half a pound less to go!

More important than the scale and the measurements to me is how strong my body is. My back is sore, my arms are sore, my ass freaking hurts, and I know that all of this is because I'm getting muscle and getting stronger. It's a really great feeling, and when I can do more reps and run longer or faster it's so much more of an accomplishment than smaller numbers.

Checking in

Yesterday wasn't that great of a day for me, that lack of sleep just knocked everything out of whack and being so tired had me craving carbs all day long. I went way over carbs, a little over calories, and didn't hit the gym. But I got my BBM in, did a little bit of dancing...it was an off day but it happens. Today I'm rested and going to do better.

That dirty 4-letter word

DIET, you weirdos. Diet.

Holy crap, I woke up this morning STARVING. Not just craving junk I'm missing, like legit feed me Seymour mode. I ended up getting into that leftover chicken Alfredo that I managed to avoid the other night and have been staring at every time I open the fridge. It wasn't a lot at least, its just a slight fallback from my cutting carbs plan and I've logged it and will still stay within my calorie goals for the day. Which brings me to a very good point and kind of my personal life motto:

  If you are hungry freaking eat something.  

It doesn't matter what diet you're doing or how healthy you're eating, if you're withholding food when you're hungry you're going to end up binging.

Let me start this by saying whenever I use the word "diet" in my posts, I'm simply referring to my normal food intake, not any particular diet plan. You will not see me take pills, use wraps, or hear the words detox or cleanse come out of my mouth or off of my keyboard, aside from this post. No matter how many hours of infomercials they air, it's not happening. Right now I'm just doing a calorie deficit figured out by calculating my TDEE (Google is your friend) and as mentioned before I'm trying to cut back on carbs a bit. I still eat brown rice a few nights a week because dh is in the Navy, we have a budget lol. But as far as pastas, breads, chips, refined sugars, etc those are getting cut back as I believe they'll help me with my biggest area, my waist. As you follow me in this journey though, you'll see me change my eating habits up a lot and when I hit the plateaus I'll lower or raise calories (believe it or not, your body won't lose if you're not eating enough) and mix up my macros to give my body a little shake up.

Here's the thing about diets, they all have science behind them that say that they work (well, most of them). That's because they all DO work! Every single persons body is unique and reacts to different stimuli in different ways, both physically and psychologically. What works for one won't necessarily work for another. You have to just find a *healthy* eating routine that works for you in your life, and you don't do that by trying something out for a week or two and then switching because you didn't lose anything. Give it a couple months, at least, before you make your decision on whether or not it's working out.



Today's update on me, I got 3 hours of sleep last night because I was up working late, when you add that with the 39 degree weather (in Florida) that I woke up to and it's usually a recipe for lay around in pjs all day. But so far I've managed to keep be steady with picking up the house and laundry, got my day 8 of BBM in. It wasn't pretty, or awesome, and I'm super freaking tired, but it was better than sitting on the couch. The real challenge will be forcing myself to get to the gym this evening.

Family Hike Saturday/ My Poor Thighs

For the last couple of months my family and I have gotten into hiking and try to go out every weekend if we can. Living in Florida, we have seen a few really beautiful and awesome places and have so many more planned. The kids have a blast and get worn out (always a plus). I suspect that my husband only tolerates these trips to keep me happy but I'll take it. Being a huge nerd family who partake in a lot of video gaming, computer time and Netflix binging, we definitely needed something that gets us moving together.

Today it was super drizzly and foggy so we went right next door to Kathryn Abby Hannah Park and did their trails, let the kids hit up the playground and ended up at the beach. The little one likes to walk most of it so it's not a big cardio workout but we put in about 3 miles today and the terrain makes it interesting for the thighs.

I skipped the gym since we had a full day but as I was sitting here after dinner it hit me that I didn't do my Bikini Body Mommy workout. 9pm, just finished up Game of Thrones (</3), husband was giving the little a bath, what I really wanted to do was lie on this couch for the rest of the night and do my Facebook/TV/Instagram binge. But fuck it, it's only like 15 mins, I got up and did it. Day 6 done, 84 more to go and you know, despite being tired I managed to do more of each exercise than last time, even if a couple of them were only one more rep, that's one better than before and I'll take it. And it didn't take away from the fact that I'm still gonna lie here and get my screen time in, just a little more sore and an extra bottle of water downed, not a bad way to spend 15 minutes.

So I'm probably not going to be posting every day, which I'm sure you're grateful. Or maybe I will more than I think, I don't know. I'm going to post when I need to post be it once a day or once a week. But when I end these I'll try to always list a few accomplishments, fallbacks, and how my body is feeling.

Accomplishments: Other than  that awesome 5k I posted about yesterday, in the last 2 days I've managed to not eat a single fry out of my kids small fries treat, and tonight I made pasta for the rest of the family and stuck with just alfredo chicken and tomatoes, pasta free (I'm not going crazy low keto carb free but am trying to cut back). And I'm not feeling bummed about it! My chicken was awesome.

Cravings: Sherbert ice cream. Like, feeling like a meth head needing a fix, would sell small body part for big tub of rainbow sherbert. If there was a store open that carried it within 10mins from home I'd have some, too, no shame. But sadly, there isn't. If I'm still craving it tomorrow I'm getting some because I'm not going to deny myself, just going to make it fit into my calories/macros for the day, and eat a small bowl vs the whole tub. Hopefully.

My thighs HURT. My back muscles HURT. I'm so ready for rest day tomorrow.

Yes, this is happening

"Nobody wants to hear about your workout." 

"What if I told you you didn't have to make a post every time you went to the gym."

"An Atheist, a vegan, and a crossfitter walk into a bar. I only know this because they told everyone within two minutes."

So, this is crap you'll see all over social media these days. It's cool to post about your Netflix binging, which trust me, I do, but someone posts about their fitness and diet accomplishments and people just try to shut it down. I could probably successfully dive into the psychological reasons why this is, but I'm going to skip all of that and just say to these people:

Suck it.

 I can almost guarantee that none of those people are posting those things for you. Having been in this place and made this journey before, I can tell you that getting your body healthy and keeping it that way takes a lot of hard work and focus. When people do things like make status updates, tweets, IG posts, and blogs about their hard work it's their way of keeping their mind focused, and you definitely don't have to read it or be interested in it, but don't be an ass and bash it. This shit is hard. Don't be a dick.

So with all of that being said, I guess I'll continue this intro with a little about me and my weight and fitness stats today, and hopefully in 357 days I can look back at this and go damn, I fucking kicked my body's ass. We'll see.

I am a 28 year old mother of 3 children ages 10, 3, and 1. About 3 years ago I went from around 270lbs to 183lbs by counting calories and working out. In that time I've moved 3 times (husband's work), had 1 baby, quit a 10+year smoking habit, and managed to gain almost every last bit of that weight back. But I'm not going to start talking about all of my self frustration and disappointment I have because of that, just gotta let that go and get back to it. So here's my weight and measurements:

Weight: 255

Chest: 47

Natural (high)Waist: 41

Low waist:49

Hips: 52

Rarm: 15.5

Larm: 15

Rthigh (upper): 29.5

Lthigh (upper): 29.5

Rcalf: 17.5 

Lcalf: 17

*Pics added later*

For fitness I'm trying to get back into running which is what I did the first time I lost weight, and lifting. Right now I'm running at the gym and doing the online Bikini Body Mommy challenge (on day 5). Yesterday I did a 5k on the treadmill to get my starting average time:

I've got a ways to go to get to that >10min mile I was at, but I'm ok with this start time. The base where we live puts on a 5k every couple of months and one of my goals is to do every single one, the first one is on the 21st so we'll see how much I improve by then and compare each run. 

So that's it, my embarrassingly bare all first weightloss blog post, completed by me, for me. And if you happen to get something from it as well, fantastic. If you're on this journey too, we've got this.